Is it really worth it?

This is what I've been asking myself since my last post.

I struggled through the cookie making this year. Ended up ruining two batches of cookies due to (I think) bad baking soda so I had to make those kinds twice.

We got up early Saturday morning and went to mom's cause she wanted a family portrait now that both of us are married. It took over 3 hours to get the portrait. *shudder* Afterward dad insisted on buying us lunch. After lunch we escaped for a little while from the chaos that is my brother and sil.

Got up early on Sunday morning and trudged over to Mom's. Once there, I took over the kitchen duties cause mom's back was still hurt. I ended up carving the turkey and the ham despite the fact that there were 3 men present. SIL did not help at all using the excuse that she was pregnant. I had expected her to be limited because she is 6 months pregnant but I didn't think things like setting the table and stirring the vegetables were too much for her. While we ate, I watched my brother fix SIL's plate and cut her meat into small pieces. I had to bite my tongue to ask if he was going to chew it for her too. After lunch, I helped mom clean up while sil sat on the couch with a heating pad cause sitting at the table made her back hurt. I got more and more disgusted as I watched mom trying to do dishes while her back spasmed and seeing sil sitting on the couch doing nothing. dad and DH even helped but brother was too busy taking care of sil. After cleaning up, we opened gifts. Mom was very appreciative of the autographed books that we got her and she went nuts over the afghan that I made her. Dad said thanks and set everything to the side so I have no idea what he really thought of everything. Brother and SIL turned their noses up with a disdainful "OH" after seeing their gifts of afghans and books. I ended up feeling like I was very unapreciated. I enjoyed the things that I got which included a lot of movies, a smoothie maker, and stuff to knit socks which is one of the things that I want to learn to do. After gifts, we played some yahtzee and skip-bo. By the time we got home I was exhausted and a little disgusted. I told DH that if tried to cut my meat for me because I was pregnant, I'd chop his arm off.

Monday, I came to work. It was very boring here by myself. Dad, brother and sil were supposed to come and bring me lunch but they never showed so I sat at work by myself all day monday with nothing to eat and I wasn't able to leave to get something since I was the only one there. There reason for not coming was that sil was tired. Apparently she couldn't be left alone to sleep so none of them came. I was furious. Thankfully there were enough phone calls to keep me occupied without overwhelming me so the day went pretty fast.

I'm beginning to believe that the holidays just aren't worth the hassle. DH says next year will be better because we'll just stay home instead of dealing with the aggrevation that surrounds my family. My parents are talking about going to my brother's house next year since the baby will be born and it's their first grandchild. I wish them the best but I won't be going. I don't think there is any way that sil will be able to handle having all of us at her home and I don't know how much I will be able to deal with if it is anything like this year.

The highlight of last week was that I got a $250 bonus for christmas and a $500 a year raise so next year will be a little easier since DH got a big raise too. Next month begins the actual seeing of houses so hopefully I will have my home soon.

I'm actually wishing for a gtg with friends at this point just so I can spend some time with people that understand how to interact like adults.